I have people reach out through my website who are adopted or donor conceived and are at the very start of a search, asking where do I even start? It can be overwhelming trying to learn all of the ins and outs of searching whether using access to records or DNA testing.
Here’s how I responded to a recent query:
"Dear Brianne, I'm adopted and my state (NY) has closed records. Where do I even start?”
Dear Adopted and Ready to Search,
There is a lot of support and information for someone in your position, and fortunately there are advocates working to change the NY state law on records for adoptees right now.
I have written a book The DNA Guide for Adoptees that covers the different ways to search for you to discover information on your birth origins and the type of support you can get – from confidential intermediaries, search angels, etc. And how DNA testing fits in.
My suggestion is to start with the book first and connect with resources described in the book, like Facebook groups dedicated to adoption searches (or dnaadoption.org if you aren’t on Facebook).
It can be very confusing at first, so if books aren’t how you learn best and you need a consult just to have your questions answered, I would be happy to help you. You can schedule a time with me through my online system: www.watersheddna.com/schedule.
Best of luck in your search.
I know it can be emotional and draining, so I hope that you take care of yourself during the process. It’s so important!